Is love always so cold?
by TattooShadow
Summary: Another lost but now found story. The brains of the Golden trio cannot stand how far she has fallen and comes to see the portrait of Severus Snape, the only person she has a desire to see.


_*Found this while going through some old computer files before the crash and I didn't even realize I had it so here you go*_

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**Is Love always so Cold?**

There used to be a thing called 'love'. She used to believe in it. However, life taught her at quite a young age that love can be many different things and has many meanings for people. Love, she had always believed, meant being faithful to your significant other, to cherish your family and hold them in the highest regard. She discovered the 'love', to her significant other, meant cleaning the house, tending to his every need and being subservient. It had never been what she had expected.

Love had never given her roses, or kind words. Love had never treated her as if she meant something. Love had never given her those moments of bliss when nothing else in the world mattered. Instead, it had given her grief. It had preyed upon her naïve beliefs and stripped her of her dreams. Love had left her feeling old and barren.

She couldn't do what a supposedly good woman could do. She couldn't bend for the rest of her life. It wasn't her nature. For years she did as she was told and believed that their way of life was the way it was supposed to be. That was until she had heard stories of her friend's happiness. Why were they so happy? Why wasn't she? Time passed and as life went on, she became cold and bitter. It was a surprise really. She hadn't expected to become like one of her old Professors. She hadn't expected to hate so openly now. Everything had finally caught up to her. She could no longer hold onto a life so meaningless and so devoid of love so she left.

Hermione Granger Weasley, now aged thirty-two, walked down the old corridors of Hogwarts. It was winter now. The air was cold and bitter just as she was. It was a strange comfort in a way. She walked down into the dungeons, stepping into the desolate and empty classroom. No one was at the school currently. Everyone had taken the holiday and for that she was grateful. There was only one purpose for her being there and she would not leave until it was done. With resolution, she walked through the office of Professor Severus Snape.

The man was sitting in his portrait, reading a book when she walked in. He instantly frowned and set it aside, his eyes narrowing with suspicion. The classroom and office were no longer used so he often left his other portrait to sit there away from everyone.

"Mrs. Weasley," he sneered.

"Please call me Miss Granger," she replied desolately as she sat before his portrait. "I came to speak with you." He quirked a brow at this.

"Really? Why is that? If you are attempting to ask for advice on your Potions making I'm afraid you'll be sorely disappointed," he snarled.

"No. I do not brew potions anymore."

"Hmm…then what do you do?" he asked indifferently.

"I stay at home and tend to Ronald and the house. He still believes that we are capable of having children so I am not permitted to go anywhere. He thinks stress is the reason for my infertility," she replied blandly.

"Ugh! Spare me the details! Obviously, Weasley is dumber than I have ever thought him to be. Do you work?"

"No."

"Do you follow your academics?"

"No."

"Did you finish schooling after Hogwarts?"

"No."

"My god woman, what the hell have you been doing!" he snapped.

"I told you already."

"To think you call yourself a Gryffindor."

"Insult me all you want, I know I deserve it. I'm a coward and failure. However, I came here to ask something of you," she replied with no emotion. Professor Snape was astonished that this woman was the same fiery Gryffindor that he had taught. He looked into her eyes and was shocked to see no life. There was no shine, no happiness.

"What did you wish to ask?" he asked in a quieter tone.

"I wanted to know what it was like for you…to love someone," she said and saw his portrait figure stiffen.

"I do not discuss personal things like that even after death!" he snapped.

"I know you love Lily, Professor. I just wanted to know…if love was always so cold and pointless. All my friends seem happy. I don't understand where I went wrong," she replied quietly. There was silence as Severus Snape stared down at the woman who just looked blankly at the floor. She really was miserable.

"Miss Granger, 'love' is not an academic. I am unfortunately the wrong person to ask about it. I loved someone who did not love me in return. If I were being truthful I would say that love is nothing but a painful reminder or something I could not have," he told her. When she looked back up at him, her eyes were glazed over with tears.

"I know now that I made a mistake. I wish I could go back and change it all but I can't. I've given up everything. I always thought I would have this wonderful marriage and happy family with Ron, but I don't and I have never felt so hateful in my entire life until now," she said.

"Miss-Hermione, I have not always been kind to you and for that I apologize, but despite what people believe, I have always been concerned with the wellbeing of my students. I am sorry that life has been cruel to you," he said sincerely. She wiped some tears from her eyes and looked up at him again.

"You know…I wish I had been Lily," she said softly. He cocked his head to the side and frowned slightly.

"Why?"

"Because she was so completely loved despite everything. I wish I had been able to have a chance at life with you."

Her words shocked him to the very core. He stared at her in disbelief. No one had ever said such a thing to him. Not even his precious Lily. If only there were a way that he could show her what love really felt like.

"It doesn't matter now…" Her voice roused him from his thoughts. "I've decided to take the coward's way out. It was easier than I thought, really. I have nothing worth staying behind for."

"What do you mean? What did you do?" he asked worriedly.

"You'll find out soon enough. I imagine I will be seeing you sooner than anyone might have thought," she said tiredly and turned around to lay her head on the desk.

"Miss Granger! Hermione!"

"I'm still here…" she whispered.

Severus Snape ran through the other portraits and to the one sitting on his desk. He was now facing the young woman who was lying on her arm and gazing at him with glazed eyes.

"Tell me what you did," he said firmly. Hermione reached into her robes a pulled an empty vial from it, setting it next to the portrait for Snape to see. His face fell slightly and his shoulders slumped as he looked back at her. "There is no cure for that poison. Although, my wish was not for you die…I will wait for you on the other side."

"Really?" she choked, feeling the tears fall.

"Yes, Hermione. I will wait for you. Unlike everyone else in your life, I will not leave you alone," he told her and saw the hope and happy shine in her eyes. It was probably the first sign of life in years. He felt a tear run down his cheek as he watched the life of the once fiery, know-it-all Gryffindor slip away and prepare to meet him on the other side. For them there was no chance in life for love, but perhaps they could find love with each other in death.


End file.
